Use 'could you' for soft asks, 'please' for clear ones
'Could you send the file?' is polite. 'Please send the file.' is also polite — just more direct. Use 'could you' when the person has real discretion to say no. Use 'please' when the action is expected and routine. Stacking both — 'Could you please…?' — is fine, but doing it for every ask flattens the signal.
BeforeCould you please possibly maybe send me the file when you get a chance?
AfterPlease send the file by EOD — or let me know if that's tight.
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